Dalloway Chapter 3

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Doctor, your tabs are not effective enough to bring me to the dark realm of sleep. Another white tab was in my hand. Doctor would certainly scold me for doing this. I felt the cold water running down my throat. Fauré’s Requiem is so relaxing, would God curse me for listening to Requiem instead of lullaby? I should stop thinking. Breath in, breath out, slowly, breath in, breath out, breath in, breath out. The cellar is swirling. No, close your eyes Dalloway. Breath in, Fa La Do La. What would doctor say? No, breath in, breath out. The bed sheet is so comfortable. Where should I put my left arm? I don’t need it tonight. Sleep, girl, sleep. I heard the clock tick, it might be 2 o’clock in the morning. Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep, slowly, sleep, sleep, sleep. No, this is not a good incantation. What is the name of this Fauré’s piece?

Could you turn it down a bit, it is too loud. “Of course”, shouted my dad from the other room. It was raining so heavily outside. Fix the door, somebody please fix the door. It is too vulnerable, somebody might break in. “Fix the door!”, shouted little Dalloway. I was alone, I knew I had been left alone for years. I was so scaried. The wind blew so hard as if it would like to swallow my house down its throat. There was a loud hard knock on the other side of the door, little Dalloway screamed.

Then she woke up on her comfortable bed in the dark, breads of sweat all over her face. The sound of a car passing by is heard faraway. It is so quiet that Dalloway can hear her heart beating fast. Now the whole enchantment to sleep will have to start again. Doctor, would you be so kind to let me take another extra tab? Will I wake then in the morning if do? Will I wake again anymore? Or will I have to get locked up in that fearful house in the world of heavy rain and strangers for good?


Suggested soundtrack: Requiem Op. 48: I. Introït et Kyrie by Gabriel Fauré and Anonymous